Thursday, March 19, 2009

America, Home of the Malcontent

I spent some time yesterday doing what the majority of the free world was – filling out my March Madness bracket. I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not really a huge fan of basketball, college or pro. My husband and I always take these first two tournament days off, mostly I spring clean. He’ll be watching the championship run non-stop so I figure I might as well have some fun even if I don’t know much of shit about the teams.

Let me say now that I filled mine out on my own time, at home and on my own computer. I’m not judging those that did theirs on the clock or on their employer’s equipment, just saying that I did not.

I had heard that Barack (hey – I voted for him so I figure that puts us on a first name basis) was going to fill out a bracket on the air on ESPN. I thought this was pretty cool, that we have a president hip enough to care about March Madness and fun enough to share his picks with the rest of us. His picks were bound to piss off some schools which would have been enough to keep a lesser man mum on the subject. Let’s face it though, only one team will win and the rest of them should just suck it up and stop with the whining already. I’m sure his picks weren’t any more personal (or prophetic) than the picks made by the thousands of “sports analysts” that have been going on and on about this for weeks. And it’s not like he threw in an 8 billion dollar bet on the outcome.

Being the keen observer of human nature that I am, I knew it would just be a matter before some curmudgeon put their foot in it. But even I was momentarily stunned when it came from Duke’s own Coach K. As soon as I heard it I knew the shit was going to hit the fan. Sure enough, message boards, blogs, even CNN is abuzz with the fallout from this comment:
"Somebody said that we're not in President Obama's Final Four, and as much as I respect what he's doing, really, the economy is something that he should focus on, probably more than the brackets," Krzyzewski told a reporter from the Associated Press on Wednesday.

What a brilliant insight. I’m sure that President Obama should be focused 24/7 on fixing all the fucked up problems in the US. Maybe he should budget a few grand for Depends so he doesn’t have to bother with pesky bathroom breaks. And he can be hooked up to some of those nutrition bags that deliver all your dietary needs intravenously so he won’t need time to eat. I mean, how dare he take a moment to do something frivolous that might give himself and some others 5 minutes of enjoyment.

This same thing happens in the work place. We recently had a bowling tournament between departments. At lunch time the groups went to the local alley and bowled against each other. It was fun. It was good for morale. But of course we had people who sat in their cubicles with their mouths screwed up so tight they looked like puckered assholes, saying things like “I can’t believe everyone is wasting their time bowling. There so much work that needs to be done.” I’m sorry, but you’re not so important that the entire company will implode if you’re not there for an hour and half. Hell, you don’t bother to drag your sorry ass into the office until 9:30 every day. We’re all salary. And we all bust our humps a hell of a lot more than 40 hours a week. We don’t need your stick-in-the-ass attitude. And we don’t need Coach K’s either.

Exactly what is Coach K doing to help this country? He’s an educated, wealthy man. But his entire life’s work is around coaching a FUCKING GAME. Maybe he should wake the fuck up and get a real job that actually does something to lift the US out of the giant shit hole it’s immersed in. Otherwise he should just shut his pie hole and keep enjoying his millions while the rest of us hard working Americans get ulcers about job security, crappy medical care and disappearing retirement funds. And hope we might win $50 on the outcome, because that $50 might mean we can buy groceries or diapers or medicine.


  1. I hadn't heard about coach K. That is kinda funny.

    I completely agree that everybody needs a break now and then. Nobody can work for 12 hours straight and actually be useful.

  2. If our president spent the same amount of time analyzing the teams and filling out his bracket as I did (est. time - 5 minutes. 5 random, non-basketball knowing minutes), I trust our enconomy didn't tank in that time. I find it lame that a college basketball coach - someone, I'm sure, if it's anything like the college basketball coaches in my state - who is paid millions of dollars a year is griping about anything economic.

  3. What a great attitude of Coach K. Sounds a little like taking your marbles and going home to me.

  4. Wonder if Coach K would have felt the same if his team had been in the Final Four?

  5. Funny you wrote about this because I was reading the article today about the coach saying that and thought WTF? I did not vote for Obama, but hope he does well because he is our president. He does well, we will do well. Right? Anyway, do you know the back story to this? I don't know the exact story but here is the gist of it. When he was on the campaing trail he took some time to shoot hoops with a NC coach or something like that. He told them that if he got in office, he would show his own brackets. Or something like that. (I don't follow basketball.) Long story short - he kept his word. Good for him! I think it is impressive that he did that. And you are right. He deserves to have a little time to himself. Jeez! That coach is just being a hater.

  6. "I can’t believe everyone is wasting their time bowling."

    This is total horseshit. A large part of US national output is devoted to leisure pursuits.

  7. Like it or not, college sports generate more jobs than the Porkulus Bill ever will and I'm not even talking about the coaches.

    However, even I won't begrudge the Obamesiah enjoying the fun of March Madness. There's more important things to worry about.

  8. I feel the same way about all ball games - nothing! Leave it to the men. I do enjoy tennis though..

  9. Bowling is not a waste of time. It's a waste of time to sit in your cubicle pouting.


  10. Coach K can go FUC_ OFF!

    Professional Sports are designed by corporations and advertisers to placate the great unwashed and keep them distracted from dealing with real issues.

    Now that professional athletes (and College kids aren't exactly amateurs anymore are they?)are not even expected to be role models the whisper-thin veneer of the whole schmazzola is getting translucent.

    Think I'm kidding. What would attendance be if alcohol and ad's were banned?

    It works all over the world buyt America loves it's sports spectacles..I'm only interested if wardrobe malfunctions are guaranteed.

  11. I heard so much of this coach stuff when I lived in Texas, football down there is cut throat even in elementary school between teams and the 'angry' issue is bull shit in my eyes...

    I like the comment about ads and alcohol, that is true, restaurants that do not have bars or TV to watch games do not do as well...