Hoodchick's back and loaded

Ok, I haven't written for a really, really long time. I've had a bit of depression going on what with the crappy winter weather, cancer dog, bf's getting divorced, etc. But, some of my friends are totally ragging me so time to stop lurking and blossom back onto the scene, similar to the tulips brightening my flower beds. April showers, bah! I'm an April kid and there's nothing like April to pick up the spirits.

Where to start though - while you all might think I've been slacking I actually have been collecting an assortment of strange pictures, stories and things for your entertainment. Well, they entertained me. The thing that amazed me the most is the number of comments I had queued up to moderate. Some are crap, of course. Some are funny. And then there's this person that commented the following, I'll remind you, on a blog called "My Life Requires Alcohol":

"A profaned, offensive blog...yes, I know that one does not have to read it, right? Pardon me for accidentally visiting the page here and reading a sample of a life certain ones wish not to live of it. Have you drinking considered non-alcoholic beverages and feeding on less junk food?"

Well, I will admit that I just killed a bottle of French Maid Cab (my current favorite) but the FIRST time I read that comment I was stone cold sober and my first thought was "You speaka english?" closely followed by "Douchebag" - neither of which I think the commenter will appreciate. Is it just me, or should they learn to use their internet parental control on their own web access? And, BTW, Douchebag, I don't pardon you.

So, anyway, to catch you up:
Little Miss Perfect (LMP) couldn't live up to her own standards and filed for divorce from my BIL. Boy has this been fun, you're sure to see more posts about this, mostly how much I think they are mentally fucking up Mini-J...

Bestie has a new nickname of TSO - THE SLOW ONE. LOL, that is going to be a fun fun post when I fill in the last few weeks.

And my newest bestie - CB - Cranky Bitch, aka Manlicky, aka TBD. You know when you meet someone and it feels like you've known them FOREVER and can tell them anything (regardless of how much alcohol has been consumed) - that's CB.

So, stay tuned and I hope I live up to my own hype if I survive Captain Clueless' wrath about my jamming to Meatloaf's Bat Out Of Hell album for the last half hour. Jesus, what environment did he grow up in to not appreciate Bat Out Of Hell. Don't you know that I need you? You gotta know that I serve you. For crying out loud you know I love you!